The Six Paramitas - Wisdom

Kyohei Mikawa

Minister, Rissho Kosei-kai of Los Angeles

Let us explore the final element of the Six Paramitas: wisdom. Buddha's wisdom is the emptiness of all things. According to Ani's The End of Suffering, emptiness means understanding that "all phenomena are interdependent, impermanent, and empty of fixed essence. (p.114)" Buddhists celebrate this wisdom because the absolute lack of a permanent essence in any phenomenon means that our experience of suffering and emotional pain can always change depending on how we view and relate to it.

This wisdom can be more practical than it may sound. Ani continues: "Integrating the concept of wisdom into practice invites a dialogue about life experiences, emphasizing the significance of learning from adversity. Through applying wisdom, we can unpack our life stories, transforming dysfunction into personal growth through insightful reflection. This synthesis provides clarity and allows us to recognize our inherent capacity for adaptation and resilience. (p.115)" How does it work in reality?

Last night, I failed to maintain peace of mind. I brought home a broken printer from my office and saw that four of my children's friends were visiting. At least one or two children come to our house almost every day to play, which often creates a little mess in our house. I sometimes feel that the peaceful space of my home is disturbed by them in ways I cannot predict, and that this anxiety makes me sensitive to what they do.

As I entered a kitchen, I saw a ruptured water balloon creating a small pond on the floor, which triggered my already sensitive mind. Then I loudly asked, "Who did this?" But nobody admitted it, or perhaps they did not know. I did not yell, but inside I was angry-my peace of mind was gone. After the children left, I started to work on a broken printer. I was not able to fix it, but learned a great deal about its structure and the nature of the inkjet printing problem. I plan to continue working on it this weekend.

Through this experience, I noticed something interesting: maintaining peace of mind was much easier when dealing with the broken printer than facing a mess created by children in my living space. Both situations are beyond my full control, yet my reaction to them was very different. Why? I shared this with my wife Emily, and she said, "Constant creation of mess by children in our place is necessary because we are keeping our kids at home instead of sending them to a daycare after school so that we can save money. If we cannot tolerate this never-ending micro chaos, we should consider their daycare. Otherwise, taking care of a little daily chaos is what comes with it. I rather accept it."

I was amazed by her perspective. Reflecting on our conversation, I realized that I had different expectations about each situations. With the printer, my expectation was low. If it remained broken after my attempt to fix it, I could accept that easily. But with the children, I expected them not to create messes or damage our furniture. Recognizing what was happening in my mind was liberating because it revealed the cause of my anger. Yet understanding alone does not solve everything.

The real issue was not the children but my expectation of them. I should not begin with expectation but with reality: when several children play in our home, there will always be a little mess. My old expectation was often left unfulfilled. So I asked myself, "Do I want to keep getting angry about this, or find a new way of relating to it?" I choose not to repeat my habit. Buddhism teaches us to begin changing our habits by noticing our unwholesome ones.

What I can do is continue kindly asking the children to be careful while also accepting the small daily chaos that naturally arises, just as my wife exemplifies.

The Buddha's wisdom of emptiness is true: my expectations have no permanent essence. Because they arise from conditions, they can also change. Understanding this helped me begin to let go of them.

Attaining wisdom is wonderful. But the journey of learning in the process toward attaining wisdom may be even more fulfilling.

What practice of "wisdom" are you engaging in today?

Wondrously,

Kyohei